Drive-thru

The USPS needs to install a drive-thru window.  I can get food, coffee, dry cleaning, liquor (in AZ), married (in Vegas), and money from a drive-thru window.  I just want some freakin' stamps, and standing in Christmastime-lines with my two boys Drake-Zilla and Flynn-Ra isn't an appealing option. 

In the spirit of the holiday

Allow me to take this moment to become schmaltzy and share all the things for which I am thankful. (Cue string section).

I am thankful for my wonderful husband, who somehow manages to still find me attractive after seeing what I am like on the inside... literally.  (Not sure why he is fascinated by my innards, but, to each his own.)

I am thankful for my two boys, who make me smile and take notice of the minutiae around us.  (Fuzzy caterpillars are a favorite, or, as Drake calls them "fuzzy appapois".

I am thankful for my parents, who are able to enjoy Karma working her magic.

I am thankful for moments spent with friends, even if it's just an hour.

I am thankful for the support of friends and family, near and far.

I am thankful for the roof over my head and the food in my cupboard.

I am thankful for stretch denim.

Technology?

Two new advances in technology have come to my attention and make me question where the heck our priorities are.

First, the iPhone has a new app called the "Cry Translator".  Yes, hold the phone up to your screaming baby and the app will let you know why your child is crying.  My guess is because the child is upset and you are holding up a phone to him/her instead of providing comfort.  Duh!  (All I keep thinking of is the episode of The Simpsons with the baby translator.  "I have soiled myself.  How embarrassing.")

Second, a new type of service dog is being trained to find the most terrifying of all substances in this day and age: peanuts.  Your allergic child can now take this service animal to school, friends' houses, anywhere, and the dog will find the life-threatening snack.  But, what if your child is like mine: allergic to peanuts AND dogs?  Will a service monkey be available to find both peanuts and dogs?

Really, people?  Can't we be working on solving world hunger or something more substantial?

Post-Surgery Update

Thanks for all the thoughts, prayers, and well-wishes, everyone!  It helps to go through something like this with lots of support.

Everything went really, really well on Tuesday morning.  My appointment was at 8:30 am.  My face was heavily numbed by 8:40.  (Why is getting anesthesia the most painful part?  Oh, sweet irony!)  By 9, I could smell my flesh being burned away.  (Yum?)  Tim was able to return to the exam room a little bit later.  He told me the hole in my cheek was rather large.  Didn't think much of it at the time.  By 9:30, the doc returned to tell me that all was clear.  How great that she only had to do one pass!  She stitched me up and I was home by 10:15.  My doctor was fantastic.  She has twin 7 m.o. girls, so during the surgery we talked about our kids teething and where to buy inexpensive children's clothing.  At home, my mom was taking care of Flynn.  Luckily, Drake was at daycare; I just didn't have the energy to deal with his high energy.

Yes, I have a Nemo icepack on my face.

I was in some pain most of the day and quite swollen.  Pain pills, good!

Can you see the shiner start to form?

The first thing Drake said to me when he returned home was, "Mommy has an owie."  He then proceeded to snuggle into my lap.  He was very concerned and protective.  He even shared his Halloween candy with me.  (He returned to his normal 2 y.o. self by morning.)

I was still pretty out of it yesterday.  Today, I feel almost normal.  I still have some swelling, but I was able to take the bandage off today.  Holy crap!  25 stitches.  Thankfully, she did a great job: no puckering and such.

This would have been a great look for Halloween!

They say the truth is stranger than fiction.  Not in this case.  I'm telling everyone I was in a bar fight- far more entertaining (for me).

Pre-surgery report

On Tuesday, I go in for surgery to remove a basal cell carcinoma from under my right eye.  I haven't really freaked out about having skin cancer, as is my usual m.o.  Typically, upon hearing bad news I burst into tears.  I didn't this time.  I've been rather blase about the situation, for two basic reasons.  1) It could be so much worse.  The spot is small; only a tiny bit a skin will have to be removed.  I'm not losing a large section of colon, or a breast, or a testicle (if I had any).  2) I've got bigger fish to fry.  Lately, I've had to deal with other issues: Flynn cutting three teeth (and, therefore, not sleeping); Drake's behavioral issues (which may be caused by a medical problem- we are seeing lots of specialists right now); an old family friend had a massive stroke; Tim's contracting job was reduced from 10 weeks to 5; whiny students who can't seem to read simple instructions; and so on.  I'm not saying I'm totally fine with this either.  All I'm saying is that when this is all over, someone needs to buy me something pretty.

Whoo-hoo!!!!

Whoo-hoo!!!!

New computer....yippie!!!  It's been long overdue.  My last computer I had for 7/8 years.  I was supposed to get it 6 months ago, but life had different plans.  I'm still adjusting.  This is a lot like dating.  Everything is basically the same, but all the nuances are new.  The learning curve shouldn't be too steep.  So shiny, so pretty.  Mmmm...

I'm only slightly addicted.

Oh, Mafia Wars.  Why do I feel compelled to check in on you every few hours?  Why do I become annoyed when I don't receive an energy pack right away?  Why do I feel giddy when I level up?

I am well aware that playing Mafia Wars has no value add to my life.  I know it is a time sucker.  But, in my defense, I don't have that many vices.  I don't drink, smoke, shoot heroin, troll, or other such unsavory activities.  I believe I do it because it is a mindless escape.  The boys wear me out mentally.  Grading essays wears me out mentally.  Keeping the rest of my life together wears me out mentally.  So, I am entitled to a little escapism.

Any extra Blackmail Photos?

Welcome to my blog

Ah, the Internet.  The Internet is both the best and the worst invention for an English major.  We can publish our brilliant works for the entire connected world to read and admire (whoo-hoo!).  We are also witness to the butchering and demise of the English language (ack!).  I am astonished at the high number of blogs and discussion forums that I read where basic grammar and spelling are cast aside ("I" is always capitalized, people!).  Now it is my turn to wade into the blogging pool.  I hope the water is warm.