*shudder*

I set a spider free today, instead of smashing it into oblivion screaming "Die!".  I did this because the boys were watching.  I fear spiders, even the tiny ones.  Why?  A side-effect of growing up in the Southwest.  Many of those critters are poisonous; if they aren't, they are big, hairy, and really, really ugly.  Buahahahaha.  I trace the fear to an incident in elementary school.  I was swimming in Rebecca Mork's pool (her house was directly behind mine).  A wolf spider was scurrying along the cool decking and her brother hit it with a rock.  For those unfamiliar with the wolf spider, the female carries her young on her back.  When the rock squashed the mommy spider, the babies scattered.  Hundreds of baby spiders.  (OK, maybe not HUNDREDS, but there were lots and lots and lots of the little critters.)  Creeped...me...out.  Feared spiders ever since that day.  Having the boys around has forced me to not flip out whenever I see a spider.  I don't want them to react the way I do.  They should have their own experiences with spiders before fearing them.

Sometimes fears are irrational, and sometimes they stem from an incident, like how most hoarders begin hoarding after some trauma.  My fear of sharks is somewhat irrational.  I blame John Williams and Steven Spielberg.  Jaws scared the bejezzus out of me.  To not see under the water-- no way.  Do you remember Marine Land in L.A.?  It had a tank you could swim in with rays, fish, and sharks (very, very benign sharks, but sharks nonetheless).  I went there on a class field trip and we HAD to swim in that tank.  My swim coach would have been so proud.  I never swam faster in my life, especially when one of those little buggers brushed my leg.  Everyone could hear the muffled scream emanating from my snorkel.